I want to walk on water- to have complete faith. I want to
experience those once in a life time ‘loves’ that just complete you and make
you question everything you knew and know. I probably read too many books, and I’ve
watched too many movies, my expectations are probably too high but I want my
butterflies too.
Sometimes, I crave for the interdependency, the knowing that
I have someone, my person- and on those really bad days I think that maybe if I
was different, I’ll find my person easier. There’s way too much thinking, too
much logic, too much analysis that comes with me as a person, can you relate? I’m
talking of those questions and fears that creep into your mind and you just
have to analyze them, picking them apart like bad beans from the good ones,
those ones that seem so necessary to dwell on till they cause ruin, and then
you start to wonder if you over-reacted?
This isn’t even a want again. I yearn to walk on water, to
have faith and trust so blindly- that it doesn’t even matter that I might fall,
all that matters is knowing that I will be caught. I want to surrender totally
to the cause of events, and be unbothered, dangerously unbothered. I want to go
to bed knowing that it will be okay, even when it’s not. I want to get rid of
doubt.
I do not want to sink- I want to completely and utterly be
in the knowing of who I’m walking out to meet. I do not want to be a Peter. I do
not want to sink. Don’t let me sink?
PS: This is a vote? of thanks to everyone who reads my blog an comments on it too, i hope that everything you do flourishes and people appreciate you as much as you do, me. love and light💓💓💓💓💓💓
